Would You Want to be a Telemarketer? This is NOT a Job offer

by Matt B

Photo courtesy of spierzchala

Photo courtesy of spierzchala

Nobody likes a call from a telemarketer.  Whether it is completely random, or from a company you already patronize, it is an unwelcome proposition.  Even in the “modern age” of the do not call register, some of these calls end up slipping through the cracks.  Do you no longer have a home phone?  No matter, even with the privacy associated with cell phones, they will find you.  It seems as if there is no escape from the pariahs that reside on the other end of the line, salivating for your business.

In my experience, there are four distinct personality types that people embody when receiving telemarketing offers.  You may lie within these four types.  Maybe, just maybe, you have a different method of dealing with these calls that I have never seen or heard of before.  No matter the case, here are the four ways I have seen people deal with these types of calls.

1) The Ones who Hang Up-

This is me all over.  If you are cold calling me, you are not going to get anywhere.  I do not like receiving these calls, but I also realize that the person who is talking is just working.  Since I do not like my day ruined by a-holes at work, I refuse to do the same to these people.  I’m pretty sure that they are well versed in getting hung up on, and that beats one of the alternative methods, which is….

2) The Screamer-

You know the type.  The person who lays into the caller for bothering him/her at home and wasting his time trying to sell something that was not asked for.  I never did see the point in yelling.  If you are the screamer, just imagine how much it would suck to have this job.  All of the time and energy you would waste every day on people who are angry at you after uttering 10 words.  When I look at it from this perspective, I feel pity for the caller, I guess that’s why I just hang up.

3) The Calm Listener-

Patience is a virtue, right?  Apparently, so is being polite.  The calm listener has the patience to listen to the caller’s entire introduction to the conversation, only to politely decline whatever offer they may be putting on the table.  This person’s patience is usually tested after the first declination by a cleverly crafted offer slightly better than the first.  That, or a list of reasons that the offer should not be ignored.  Still, the Calm Listener waits patiently, only to decline whatever offers are put forward…again and again.  This method is fine by me.  If you want to waste your own time, along with the person sitting in the call center, be my guest.  I just have never seen the point of humoring someone who does not have a chance of closing the deal.

4) The Impressionable Potential Buyer-

Telemarketers would not exist if the potential for a sale did not exist.  This is the reason the position still exists.  The impressionable potential buyers are few and far between, but I’m sure that when a caller makes contact with these fish, they love to reel them in.  I know I would.

I have nothing against telemarketers.  After all, they are just trying to make a living like you and me, one sale at a time.  Mix the frustration and the difficulty of making a sale given their working conditions, and I do not envy the position.  It has to be one of the most difficult and annoying jobs on the planet.

So what do you do when you get a sales call?  What kind of telemarketer customer are you?

If you are living in a cave and have never heard of the do not call register, it is a Government enacted opt-out program for people who prefer not to receive unsolicited calls.  You can sign up HERE.

Ending Note:

I did not feel comfortable placing this into any of these “personality based” traits, but I can recall my Father receiving cold calls a time or two in my younger days.  His responses were never angry, but I do recall a few instances in which he simply placed our cordless phone face down on the counter and walked away.  He would then come back to the phone a few minutes later to properly hang it up.  I always wondered what the callers did in this instance.  It always cracked me up though.

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